Writing - Why Become A (An Author) Writer?

Writing - Why Become A (An Author) Writer?

Reasons Why To Become A Writer?

Because I Met An Author

Childhood Dream

To Be Known As An Aspiring Local Author In The Library System

To Get Revenge

To Improve Upon Writing 

To See My Writing In Book Stores And Libraries

Revenge

Revenge Is Becoming A Singer And Song Writer

Revenge Is Writing A Novel

I Wish

I Wish

I wish people wouldn’t fucking think of me as a care giver

I wish people wouldn’t fucking tell me to get a job as a care giver

I wish people wouldn’t fucking associate care giving as my field 

I Wish

I Wish

I wish people wouldn’t fucking think of me as a care giver

I wish people wouldn’t fucking tell me to get a job as a care giver

I wish people wouldn’t fucking associate care giving as my field 

I Wish

I Wish

I wish people wouldn’t fucking think of me as a care giver

I wish people wouldn’t fucking tell me to get a job as a care giver

I wish people wouldn’t fucking associate care giving as my field 

Anger

I have made the decision that I need to take a long break from communication with my parents as I find them to be too annoying and I am livid with them. Right now I just want to tell them to Fucking Screw Off! 

Tuesday April 19, 2016

Good Morning All. I hope you are all doing well today on this fantastic beautiful day. I was unable to go to the gym yesterday which depressed me out. But I did get out for some exercise by going for a walk for an hour and a half and having fun as a photographer taking nature photos and yarn bombing photos with my camera. Today I am going to look at a few more stores for dresses. If I don’t like what I see I am going back to the store that has the dress on hold I was interested in yesterday and get it. Okay well that is all to blog for now.

Monday April 18, 2016

Authentic happiness is to be found not in selfishness, but in self-giving.

Good Morning All. Yesterday at church the pastor spoke about how “God never said he wanted us to be happy”. The pastor said that “God wants us to more than happy. God wants his children to be blessed”. The sermon was good. I always enjoy going to church because I take away things from the sermon which I can apply to my life.

Today my goals are to search for apartments and jobs. I might go dress hunting today. I also hope to make it to the gym tonight for Conditioning Class and also for Boxing Class.

But first I have to turn on the dryer again as my clothes are still wet. I also have to eat oatmeal and peanutbutter toast. And I want to make tea and coffee.

Okay that is all to write for now.

Sunday April 17, 2016

Yesterday I delivered newspapers and then I went to the gym for two hours. Conditioning Class was difficult but great. Boxing class was amazing. I finally have my first fitness goal to work towards. My goal right now is to gain upper body strength. After the gym I went dress hunting. I checked out a dress shop and also some stores in one of the malls and also a Salvation Army but nothing seemed appropriate to wear as a Bridesmaid dress for my friend’s wedding which is next month.

Today unfortunately I have to rest because the gym is closed but at least I was able to go out and deliver newspapers this morning. I am still busy cleaning. I was missing some tennis balls but finally found them yesterday. Tonight my goal is to go to church. I might go dress hunting today. I want to check out Sears, Mayfair Mall and a dress-shop called “Blush”.

I also want to take my camera downtown and act like a photographer. I also have to send out job applications and look for an apartment. Finally the other thing is that I want to have no contact with my parents for the next two weeks. We will see how long that will last for.

I like “The Chainsmokers” new song called “Don’t Let Me Down”. I find the song to be very powerful and it speaks to me at this time in my life.

In the song the words that speak to me are “I Need You Right Now”.  What I need from all the people in my life are for them to be supportive of my choices. I don’t want them to tell me that things will be okay. I just want them to be supportive of my choices. I have a choice to stay living in Victoria or move back to Vancouver and I am choosing not to move back to Vancouver.

Also my wrist is feeling amazing. I feel that the Tendonitis is gone. I want to attempt to do some knitting in two weeks. I might wrap my wrists up while I knit. But I want to attempt to work on knitting two sweaters. I also want to get rid of a bunch of yarn, knitting needles and crochet hooks. I only want to keep the needles and crochet hooks for my favorite patterns.

Okay that is all to write for now. I might write more later.

Tired

I am tired of trying to be somebody I am not.

I am tired of trying to make it as a writer. I am tired of trying to make it in the arts, crafts and textiles field. I am tired of trying to have an interest in musical instruments.

I am tired of trying to take other peoples interests like family members interests and make them my own.

I want to start carving my own path in the world and not try to be like my family or look towards my family for inspiration. I don’t want to ask my family about their thoughts anymore.

I want to make my own decisions. And again I want to start carving my own path in the world even though their might be struggles along the way.

Friday April 15, 2016

I need to get off my chest that I am feeling very angry. My dad and uncle think its okay to talk about me and I don’t like that. My uncle thinks he has the right to say what I should be doing with my life and that pisses me off. I know I shouldn’t be angry because I live in a different city then my dad and uncle but I am angry. I feel like my uncle should just butt out of my life. Okay that’s all I want to write for now.

 

Now for some positive news. I went to the gym and took part in Boxing class on Wednesday. I arrived at the gym too early though and just felt like warming up. Coach got pissed off at me for coming too early. Oops. I think coach thought I was hoping in taking part in conditioning class as well. Then yesterday I took part in Boxing and Kickboxing class. Today I took a break from the gym. Been cleaning today.

 

10 Crazy Goals

10 Crazy Goals

1. Becoming An Actress

2. Becoming An Artist

3. Becoming An Author

4. Becoming A Poet

5. Getting My Art Work Into An Art Gallery

6. Holding An Art Show

7. Run An Arts And Crafts Business

8. Run A Textiles Business

9. Selling My Art Work

10.       Write A Novel

Clutter and Stuff - A Poem

Clutter and Stuff

The world is full of clutter

The world is full of stuff

All throughout our lives growing up and all throughout our school lives we are told that clutter and stuff will bring us happiness

But all I find is that clutter and stuff brings me stress

The world is full of clutter

The world is full of stuff

And I am not into contributing to a world full of clutter and stuff

The world is full of clutter

 The world is full of stuff

Isn’t it a time we stopped caring about clutter and stuff and start caring living a more stress and happy free life?

The world is full of clutter

The world is full of stuff

I don’t know about you but I am tired of living in a world full of clutter and stuff

Monday April 11, 2016

Good Morning All. Early this morning I had a major headache so I had to take Tylenol. But now I am feeling better. I through my laundry into the washing machine this morning at 7am. Then I ate oatmeal and had some toast with jam on it. I also made a cup of lemon ginger tea. Now my laundry is in the dryer. Today is going to be a busy day for me. Today I have a job interview, I am looking at a house and am also going to the gym. okay that is all to post for now.

Sunday April 10, 2016

Good Afternoon All. This morning when I started to deliver newspapers I came across this young man who look about high-school age, college or university age. He had a beer in his hand and he gave me a very creepy and uneasy feeling. He was wandering over to cars on the side of the street and he kept on glancing back at me. I have a feeling that he was drunk. I delivered papers on my street and then went back indoors and stayed indoors for another ten minutes before heading back out to deliver papers. I didn’t encounter this young man again which I was thankful about. I have no doubt in my mind that I could have been a victim of rape this morning. That is my scary part of the day.

When I got home I made hot chocolate. I watched a documentary about the Syria Education System. Then I unfortunately fell asleep which I did not plan on doing and did not want to do. I had plans to go to a church service this morning but those plans were ruined.

Before I go out I want to do ten sit-ups and ten push-ups. I also want to start doing yoga daily. I am now going to go and make and enjoy some lemon ginger tea before heading out. My plan is to go to Starbucks and enjoy being in Starbucks while I send out job applications through my computer. Then I will go to church tonight.

Today I also want to write a poem or a song to post on my poem hunter page.

Okay well that is all to write for now. I might write more later. I hope you all enjoy your day and work hard for hard work is important.

Change The World

Change the world for you will feel better

Change the world for you will be doing good

Change the world for you will make a difference

Just go and change the world and don’t think twice

I tell you will all my heart to go and change the world

Go just go and change the world for changing the world will help you grow

Just go, just go and change the world and don’t think twice

Changing the world

It is a good fight

So go just go and change the world and don’t think twice  

Saturday April 9, 2016

Good Evening All. I hope you are all well on this beautiful sunny day. This morning I delivered newspapers. While delivering newspapers I almost got into a “Boxing Fight” with a raccoon. I also saw three deer this morning and also a rabbit. Today I also went to the gym and took part in boxing class. I wish I had also taken part in Conditioning class. I also checked out a house today. I am now browsing jobs to apply to.  

Friday April 8, 2016

5 Things I Am Grateful For

I Am Grateful For Deer

I Am Grateful For Dolphins

I Am Grateful For The Mountains

I Am Grateful For The Ocean

I Am Grateful For The Sun

 

Good Morning All. I hope you are all having a great day. Sorry I haven’t posted a journal entry on my blog for a while. I am just stressed out a lot and feeling depressed a lot. It is hard to finding a new place to live and it is hard to find a job. Yesterday I finished the first draft of my novel. My fantasy novel is 41 pages. I don’t feel though that 41 pages are enough so I might add extra chapters and create new characters. But for now I am putting my novel to the side. When I do go back to working on my novel I know that I have to add in more color, conversation, and more doom and gloom. Yesterday I also saw a friend. My friend and I went to McDonalds and got ice cream. WE also went for a walk. Yesterday I also went to the gym and took part in Boxing class. Kickboxing class was canceled yesterday which gave me a chance to send out enquiries about housing. Another thing I am doing is searching for a publishing contract. Okay that is all I want to write for more. Time to have a cup of coffee and send out job applications and search for housing because I want to make it to the gym tonight and work my ass off. But First Off all I think I will go for a run down to 7/11 and pick up a phone card, maybe some chips or a chocolate bar, maybe some pasta sauce and also a cold drink first. I find that exercise always makes me feel better.

Deer - A Poem

Good Morning All. This morning I am sharing a Poem with you that I wrote in Free Verse about Deer. I hope you all enjoy reading the poem..

Deer

 

Deer in the morning

Deer in the night

Deer all the time

There is nothing I like better then running into deer

I love deer

 

They bring me peace

They bring me tranquility

They bring me comfort

They make me feel that everything will turn out okay

Sometimes I feel that deer are my spirit animal

 

Deer in the morning

Deer in the night

Deer all the time

I love seeing the deer

And running into them

There is nothing better than spotting a deer in my beautiful city

 

Deer in the morning

Deer in the night

Deer all the time

I love deer and always will love deer

Tuedsday April 5, 2016

Good Afternoon All,

I hope you are all well. This morning I delivered newspapers and drank coffee and finished off the Earl Grey Tea I have. I am feeling frustrated about the job hunt and apartment hunt. That's all for now. I had better go to the gym now and work off my frustrations and anger. I also get upset when people ask me why I talk from only one side of my face. I have to be like I don't fricking know. I probably only talk from one side of my face because I had  a stroke before I was born but people shouldn't ask and should flipping mind their own business. And then the Mormons ask if I have read the book of Mormon recently. And I am like God NO. I have to find a job and an apartment. All for now. I have to finish drinking new coffee and then get out of the house. Okay so I went to conditioning and boxing classes at the gym. Now I am back at my place feeling stressed out and ill and depressed.

Monday April 4, 2016

Good Morning All. I slept in this morning until 7am. I drank coffee and have already had several cups of chai tea and earl grey tea this morning. I am looking into trying to get into University in the future. I still don't want to give up on my goal of getting a degree in Recreation Therapy. I have been watching a lot of 7th Heaven shows lately late into the evenings and as the kids grow up and get on with their adult lives they choose careers that match their personalities perfectly. For instance the oldest boy Matt becomes a doctor and he seems perfect for the career as a doctor. The oldest girl Mary in the end becomes a teacher and teaching seems to match her personality and then the third oldest girl becomes a Minister and the ministry seems perfect for her. Okay that is enough blabbing away for now through the keys on my computer laptop. I will write more later. Right now I have to finish my tea and then I have to look at an apartment at 1pm.

Sunday April 3rd, 2016

Good Afternoon All. I hope that you are all well on this beautiful sunny Sunday. This morning I delivered newspapers at 4:30am in the morning. One thing that pissed me off is that the newspapers were dropped off across the street at my neighbor’s house by mistake. When I got home after delivering the newspapers and picking up three beer cans I drank delicious black Indian chai tea. I also drank coffee and earl gray tea. At the moment I am bored out of mind sitting in a Mormon church watching a broadcast of a general conference taking place in the United States. I hate the music. The music is torture. I am sure the music moves some people but I hate, detest and despise Mormon music. Also there is nothing the speakers are saying that stand out to me. Okay I liked seeing and hearing the Asian guy speak. But still two hours of my precious time have been wasted. I have found well actually I have heard nothing that speaks to me or inspires me. One of the speakers angered me by calling illness and disabilities a sin which is such a lie and which is also wrong. Hmmm what else can I write? Well I am just fricking pissed off that I am stuck in a church when I could be outside enjoying the beautiful day going for a run or a hike. Anyways now that I am writing out my feelings for you all to read I am feeling better. Oh I had a great idea for a story to write. I thought I could write a story about a ghost and a church. I don’t want to give any more details. I am looking forward to going to church tonight. I am a Pentecostal Christian and always will be a Pentecostal Christian. Okay that is all to write for now.

How To Be Christ Like

A Blog Post On How You Can Be Christ Like In Your Life.

 



Be Christ Like By Always Striving To Improve Yourself

Be Christ Like By Being An Inspiration - Be Like Those Who Inspire You

Be Christ Like By Being Caring

Be Christ Like By Being Faithful - Pray Daily, Read Your Bible Daily, Study Scriptures Daily

Be Christ Like By Being Honest

Be Christ Like By Keeping Your Promises To Yourself And Others

Be Christ Like By Being Kind

Be Christ Like By Making A Difference In The World

Be Christ Like By Being Loving - Love Your Neighbors And Those Around You As You Love Yourself.

Be Christ Like By Being Nice

Be Christ Like By Being Open Minded

Be Christ Like By Being Polite - Say Please, Say Thank You, Smile, Use Your Manners

Be Christ Like By Being Respectful

Be Christ Like By Being Responsible

Be Christ Like By Being The Best You Can Be

Be Christ Like By Being Trustworthy

Be Christ Like By Volunteering In The Community - Volunteer At The Homeless Shelter, Volunteer At The Soup Kitchen, Volunteer For Meals On Wheels

Wednesday (Mercredi) March 30, 2016

Wednesday (Mercredi) March 30, 2016

(Note Mercredi is French for Wednesday)

Good Morning All. Yesterday I was searching for apartments. It is frustrating, depressing, difficult and upsetting at times. It makes me stressed out. I only have literally one month left to find a new place. Been writing some poems because of my frustrations. Will blog more later.

Okay I just have to get some feelings out in the open. Whenever I talk to my parents these days especially to my mom I get frustrated and angry with her. I get to the point where I don't want to talk to her for weeks at a time and just want to break off contact entirely with her. I find her to be too critical. I just seriously don't want her to be in my life anymore.

       

Poem 1: No Title

(Note – I am thinking of calling this poem 4 In The Morning)

Its four in the morning

It’s dark outside

And I am rising early

Before everyone else

Ready to push myself

And go running

While delivering papers.

 

a girls gotta do

what a girls gotta do

to become a champion

 

dressed in a rain jacket and rain pants

feet flying along the pavement

music blaring from my cellphone

papers flung onto lawns

deer being startled

rabbits quick as can be hopping across lawns.

 

A girls gotta do

what a girls gotta do

to become a champion

 

Its four in the morning

It’s dark outside

And I am rising early

Before everyone else

Ready to push myself

And become a champion

 

A girls gotta do

what a girls gotta do

to become a champion

 

Poem 2: Tears

 

Can’t stop the tears

From falling down my face

 

Feeling stressed out

Feeling depressed

Feeling all alone

Feeling like the worlds against me

 

Can’t stop the tears

From falling down my face

 

All I want to do

Is crawl under blankets and hide

Wanting to disappear

And vanish into thin air

 

Can’t stop the tears

From falling down my face

 

My spirits are low

It’s hard to stay positive

It’s hard to put on a brave outlook

It’s hard to be optimistic and smile

And pretend that everything is okay

 

Can’t stop the tears

From falling down my face

 

I am told to have faith and hope

But I ain’t got no faith and hope

I am told to pray to God by Mormons,

who think they have all the answers

But I ain’t got no time to pray to God

Or listen to Mormons talk about rubbish

 

Can’t stop the tears

From falling down my face

Crazy Pen Drawings Monday March 28, 2016

Sunday March 27, 2016: Easter Sunday

Sunday March 27, 2016: Easter Sunday

 

Good Afternoon All. First of all I want to say Happy Easter. I hope you are all well and enjoying your Easter Sunday. This morning I delivered newspapers. I drank a cup of coffee and had a cup of Earl Grey Tea. One thing I am considering doing is not drinking coffee and tea for a year to see how I feel. Maybe my body will feel better. I want to get back into drinking juice. I believe I started drinking coffee and tea in either 2008 or maybe 2010. The thing is I don’t want to be addicted to caffeine. I am noticing that I am not enjoying Earl Grey Tea and Indian Chai Tea as much as I used to. I want to be able to enjoy Earl Grey Tea and Indian Chai Tea and only have the tea once in a while now as a treat. I also want to enjoy coffee as a treat once in a blue moon. One thing I dislike about coffee and tea is that it makes you want to use the bathroom too much. Another thing I dislike about tea is that the packaging is not environmentally friendly. Every tea bag comes wrapped up in paper. And in each box of tea you only get like 20 tea bags. Okay enough about coffee and tea. I also watched some motivational videos today and listened to some music. I also created some pen drawings to mail to my great aunt and I wrote down song lyric ideas. I am heading out later on today just to enjoy the outdoors. I am also apartment hunting and job hunting. Yesterday I was talking to one of my Boxing teammates and he doesn’t think I am ready to be in a Boxing Fight. I agree with him that I am not ready to be in a Boxing Fight but I hope one day in the near future I will be ready. I have a longing to fight in the ring. I was asking him what I could do to improve and he told me to go for runs every day so I will start running daily. All right that is all I have to say for now.

Sunday March 27, 2016 - Crazy Art Work

 

 

Saturday March 26, 2016

Good Morning All. I hope you are all having a great morning and have plans for the day. Today I am applying for jobs, searching for apartments and going to the gym. But my first goal to accomplish is having a shower because I need to wash my hair. My next goal to accomplish is eating oatmeal and drinking hot chocolate as well as using a heating pad on my left knee which is killing me. Okay that is all for now.

Friday March 25, 2016

Friday March 25, 2016

Good Morning All. First Of All I Want To Wish You All A Happy Good Friday.

 

 

 

Yesterday I went to the gym and took part in Boxing and Kickboxing Classes. My Boxing and Kickboxing Coach is still always on my case about "Moving My Feet". I sometimes just forget but for the most part I am trying to move my feet more in Boxing and Kickboxing. I also watched Systema Yesterday, applied to two support worker jobs and contacted some potential housing places. I think I have also found someone who can teach me some guitar notes. Today I am meeting a friend. I will write more later. Okay so here is an update. I have been busy sending out job applications. I sent out three job applications to home care companies. I am also at Starbucks drinking coffee so that I can stay motivated.

 

Goals

 

Goals I Have For Myself

 

1. Watch Motivational Videos Every Morning

2. Watch Sports Documentaries on Athletes Every Day