Wednesday (Mercredi) March 30, 2016

Wednesday (Mercredi) March 30, 2016

(Note Mercredi is French for Wednesday)

Good Morning All. Yesterday I was searching for apartments. It is frustrating, depressing, difficult and upsetting at times. It makes me stressed out. I only have literally one month left to find a new place. Been writing some poems because of my frustrations. Will blog more later.

Okay I just have to get some feelings out in the open. Whenever I talk to my parents these days especially to my mom I get frustrated and angry with her. I get to the point where I don't want to talk to her for weeks at a time and just want to break off contact entirely with her. I find her to be too critical. I just seriously don't want her to be in my life anymore.

       

Poem 1: No Title

(Note – I am thinking of calling this poem 4 In The Morning)

Its four in the morning

It’s dark outside

And I am rising early

Before everyone else

Ready to push myself

And go running

While delivering papers.

 

a girls gotta do

what a girls gotta do

to become a champion

 

dressed in a rain jacket and rain pants

feet flying along the pavement

music blaring from my cellphone

papers flung onto lawns

deer being startled

rabbits quick as can be hopping across lawns.

 

A girls gotta do

what a girls gotta do

to become a champion

 

Its four in the morning

It’s dark outside

And I am rising early

Before everyone else

Ready to push myself

And become a champion

 

A girls gotta do

what a girls gotta do

to become a champion

 

Poem 2: Tears

 

Can’t stop the tears

From falling down my face

 

Feeling stressed out

Feeling depressed

Feeling all alone

Feeling like the worlds against me

 

Can’t stop the tears

From falling down my face

 

All I want to do

Is crawl under blankets and hide

Wanting to disappear

And vanish into thin air

 

Can’t stop the tears

From falling down my face

 

My spirits are low

It’s hard to stay positive

It’s hard to put on a brave outlook

It’s hard to be optimistic and smile

And pretend that everything is okay

 

Can’t stop the tears

From falling down my face

 

I am told to have faith and hope

But I ain’t got no faith and hope

I am told to pray to God by Mormons,

who think they have all the answers

But I ain’t got no time to pray to God

Or listen to Mormons talk about rubbish

 

Can’t stop the tears

From falling down my face